This Used Guitar Must Be a Great Deal Because I Don’t Even Want to Sell It

Troy Doetch
3 min readDec 4, 2023

My loss is your gain!

Photo by Joel Kruber on Unsplash

Used Guitar

$650
This used guitar is perfect, in mint condition, and sounds great. In fact, I don’t even want to sell it, on account of how amazing it is. But my loss is your gain, because I am selling it, albeit reluctantly. No trades. Firm on the price.

Used Guitar,

̶6̶5̶0̶ $600
I’m dropping the price down because I’m an absolute sucker, I guess. Seriously, this guitar is perfect. There is absolutely nothing wrong with this guitar, and I feel like a complete idiot selling it. It’s a vintage Fender Telecaster kept in perfect condition and is honestly worth 10 times what I’m asking. 10 times! But I am selling it, against my better judgment, so everybody, come parade around me, the moron man, and buy this guitar. Not looking to trade. Price is firm.

Used Guitar,

6̶5̶0̶ ̶6̶0̶0̶ $550
Okay, I dropped the price one more time, but I can’t afford to drop it any more. I’m already taking a total bath here, and frankly, I don’t even want to sell this guitar in the first place. It’s one of the first electric guitars ever made, and because it has been professionally set-up every year, it plays like it’s brand…

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Troy Doetch

Deaf writing teacher in Rockford, IL. McSweeney’s, Slackjaw, Points in Case. https://linktr.ee/TroyDoetch